Mary Todd Lincoln - I Know You Better Now

One of the supporting characters in the Lincoln drama was his wife, Mary Todd Lincoln. During this bicentennial year of Lincoln’s birth, much has been speculated about Mary’s mental condition. I submit that Mary Todd Lincoln has been mislabeled and maligned, even today, by people who do not credit her for withstanding an inordinate amount of tragedy.

Let’s look at the facts:

Mary Todd Lincoln’s mother died when she was seven. She lost her second-born son before he turned four, her third son died shortly after she became First Lady, and a beloved brother died in the Civil War. As First Lady, she was not accepted by Washington society. Being a Southern woman married to a Northern president, neither side welcomed or trusted her. Both thought she was a traitor. No friends or support here.

Then her husband was shot just inches away from her. Anyone who watches CSI knows what that means. The word “spatter” should convey the idea. Then Mary was pulled forcibly from her dying husband’s side because her grief was considered an inappropriate display of emotion.

Following her husband’s death, Mary was inconsolable and suffered a terrible depression coupled with great fear. Finally, her third son died before he reached adulthood.

Mary Todd Lincoln suffered from post traumatic stress disorder. No therapy or counseling for Mary, however. Instead, her eldest son had her followed and then forced into a mental institution.

What does all this have to do with communication?

It demonstrates what effective communication can accomplish. Thanks to the excellent work of the historical institutions in Springfield, this woman suddenly became real to me. Mary Todd Lincoln is no longer a shadow behind the 16th President. She stands on her own. And I admire her.

BTW – I recently discovered I am not alone in my assessment of Mary Lincoln. Read Anna Quinlend’s column in Newsweek. http://www.newsweek.com/id/185921

The Great Communicator

The media placed that label on President Ronald Reagan. I beg to differ. Reagan was an actor so he was comfortable in front of cameras and reporters. He thought quickly on his feet. Reagan delivered the message well but Peggy Noonan wrote the speeches he gave. Should she be wearing the title instead?

I ask the question because I recently returned from a trip to the Lincoln Presidential Museum and Library in Springfield, Illinois. One of the many things that I learned during that visit was that Lincoln wrote his own speeches. He toiled over them, carefully selecting words and crafting phrases that would properly convey his intent.

Lincoln was a reader. He had to be. There was no television, no Wii and no film to entertain him. We all know the stories about him reading by firelight. He became a lawyer and wrote all his arguments. When he ran for political office, it was his own words that he spoke in campaign speeches.

Lincoln could not text 140 words to anyone. He couldn’t even make a telephone call. He had to write. And what a benefit to all of us that he could. Our 16th president crafted words so well that he changed us as a nation. What would have happened, both to him and to us, if he had not given his all to the “House Divided” speech, the Emancipation Proclamation, or the Gettysburg Address?

We owe a great deal to President Lincoln. He was our greatest communicator.

More next week.