Amy screwed up. She unintentionally offended a client and still feels terrible about it. Yes, she's human and that day, definitely not up to par. The client complained to the boss and the boss corrected her.  If Amy could have dug a hole and crawled in, she would have. She did her best to apologize and wishes there was more she could do to set things right. 

I sympathized. This has happened to everyone at some point in their lives, me included. I told her that but I'm not sure it helped.

So what happened?  Amy doesn't know.  There must have been some kind of short circuit between her brain and her mouth.

Since it is not in Amy's nature to be short or sharp with anyone, something must have interfered with her edit switch. Together we dissected the event and discovered that she answered the client's question, fully expecting a joking rejoinder. Somehow her attempt at humor didn't come across.  It is impossible to know now if her tone or her expression belied her words.  Her boss let it pass.  Amy isn't sure the customer has or ever will.  She will carry this with her for a long time, mentally flogging herself every time that customer name appears in front of her.

Some days we are masters of our words; on others, we can barely put a noun and verb together.  We see it in social media all the time. Tweets are either 140 characters of genius or the tweeter is back-pedaling because what she wrote made no sense.

Communication is an exchange. It is spoken, written, performed, or displayed. No matter how earnestly we try, sometimes we will not be successful in conveying our thoughts or intentions. At that point, we have to be willing to apologize and try again. A great deal may ride on our ability to have others understand us.  Everything from world peace to inner peace.

Debt Crisis Accord

The debt crisis, the potential for default, and the last-minute compromise were the hot items on the news and talk shows for weeks.  Buried in all that were lessons to be learned that have nothing to do with world finance or economics. 

Remember, I do not take political sides.  I look at how the message is delivered and how we react to it.  We would do well to consider the communication, or lack thereof, that we recently witnessed.

At a recent party, a Democratic friend voiced an idea for saving billions while at the same time addressing the drug problem and the immigration problem.  The Republicans there loved it.  It was a good idea. It was logical; it made sense.  It solved four problems simultaneously.

I have friends who are Republicans and I have friends who are Democrats.  As I spoke to them, taking my own unofficial poll, I found they agree on most major points regarding the debt ceiling and the budget crisis.  If they are in accord, how can their representatives in Congress not be? 

Was this a case of poor communication?  Is there some other way the electorate should be telling their representatives what they want? 

Perhaps the root of the problem is buried in the word “representative.”  Its definition, from Merriam-Webster.com, is [emphasis mine]:

1. Serving to represent

2.a : standing or acting for another especially through delegated authority b : of, based on, or constituting a government in which the many are represented by persons chosen from among them usually by election

We do not live in a true democracy where everything is put to a vote and decided upon by the citizens. We live in a republic.  We select people to represent us.  Those individuals are acting for us, not for themselves – according to the definition above.  And that must be the point of the communication breakdown.  Either we or they do not understand what it means to represent. 

I sure hope that gets resolved or it won’t matter how good the communication is.